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Time To Be A Man 3:510:00/3:51
Time To Be A Man
I grew up in a quiet town where most folks don't wanna stick around
Where most folks don't wanna stick around
Except for guys like my dad
Home town pride's all he ever had
When I was a boy one night he came home
He said I lost my job and your mama's gone
He pressed that bottle into my hand
He looked me in the eyes and he said son,
It's time to be a man
Time to be a man
When I turned fifteen I dropped out of school
I was never any good at following rules
I started selling pills to pay my rent
I started taking them too and I've been doing it ever since
Till I got busted in some parking lot
Cop said guys like you either die or get caught
And he locked those cuffs around my hands
He looked me in the eyes and he said son,
It's time to be a man
It's time to be a man
It's time to choose, boy it's time to take a stand
He said it's time to find out who I really am
It's time to be a man
It's time to be a man
So here I am in this prison cell
and there won't be much of a story to tell
If I let this chance slip through my hands
To look you in the eyes an be the one to say
And be the one to say
It's time to be a man
It's time to be a man
It's time to choose, it's time to take a stand
It's time to find out who I really am
It's time to be a man
It's time to be a man
Good Friday
She said her mama died on the cross,
Wearing pearls and an albatross
With Jesus and a benzo in her brain
On Easter Sunday they laid her down,
So when I’m broke, that’s when I come around
To avail myself of all my mother’s pain
Mama let me in to take a shower
Mama let me in to clean my clothes
Mama let me in, to wash away the sin
But like Good Friday mama, I come and go
Under a scaffold, far below
High as hell, nowhere to go
I watched her sitting with a book between her hands
Choking on some fresh regrets
And electronic menthol cigarettes,
Praying that one day I’d understand
Mama let me in to take a shower
Mama let me in to clean my clothes
Mama let me in, to wash away the sin
But like Good Friday mama, I come and go
And I guess that’s why you always tell me no
Cause you can’t help,
And I can’t help myself at all
Your boy is just another junkie on the street
If this is hell and every angel has to fall
Then I’ll be crawling home for one more score
With nails right through my feet
Mama let me in to take a shower
Mama let me in to clean my clothes
Mama let me in, to wash away the sin
But like Good Friday mama, I come and go
And I know that’s why you had to tell me no
Tell Lucy that i love her
Don’t try to lie or to pretend
Everybody knew that I would end up here again
And I might have even felt relieved
If only Lucy wasn’t counting on me
But don’t let her see me in this place
Don’t make me have to see that look on her face
So here’s what I need you to do
First tell her that I’m sorry she’s gotta hear this from you
Tell Lucy that I love her but I’m not what she needs
Tell her I said she’s better off without me
Tell Lucy that I love her but I’ve gotta set her free
Tell Lucy not to worry
Tell her not to worry bout me
Then give her everything I own
Tell her to find someone and try to make a home
Then tell her everything I’ve done
All the reasons why I can’t be a father to her son
Tell Lucy that I love her but I’m not what she needs
Tell her I said she’s better off without me
Tell Lucy that I love her but that’s how it’s gotta be
Tell Lucy not to tell him
Tell her not to tell him ‘bout me
Yea I know someday he’ll be grown
I don’t want him to have the kind of life that I’ve known
And I’ll be just fine here on my own
Somewhere in the silence on the end of this phone
Tell Lucy that I love her but I’m not what she needs
Tell her I said she’s better off without me
Tell Lucy that I love her but I’ve gotta set her free
Tell Lucy not to worry
Tell her to forget about me
Praying For Rain
How long will this last?
Oh lord how many times will I ask?
My well has run dry
And there ain’t a cloud in the sky
And my body is aching from all of the years I’ve carried this curse
And the weather ain’t breaking
Oh lord I’ve just got to quench my thirst
I’m praying for rain
Praying for the purpose in all of this pain
I’m praying for rain
And that I’m not shedding these tears in vain
I don’t know what to say
So just name your price I’ll be happy to pay
I don’t know what to do
Can you hear me lord? I’m talking to you
Cause nothing is changing
And I still feel like I’m alone
And the soil is baking
And there’s no water for all of the seeds I’ve sown
I’m praying for rain
Praying for the purpose in all of this pain
I’m praying for rain
And that I’m not shedding these tears in vain
Cause Lord you know me and you know that I’m not a humble man
But you’ve shown me life can only come from your hands
I understand
I’m praying for rain
Praying for the purpose in all of this pain
I’m praying for rain
And that I’m not shedding these tears in vain
Been Gone So Long
Last time I was on these streets I was only 17 years old
But in the eyes of the law that was old enough to be tried as an adult
Now after all these years the folks round here still remember who I am
Sometimes I catch them watching me close or they just act like they don’t give a damn
Cause lord I’ve been gone so long
Now this place don’t feel like home
I’ve been gone so long
And all I want is to move on
Early in the morning I go looking for work, I bum rides since I lost my car
Hitch a couple miles to my PO Just to tell him no luck so far
I served my time and I paid my debt but there’s always something more I owe
Seems like all I can do is what I’ve always done and just go back to what I know
Cause lord I’ve been gone so long
Now this place don’t feel like home
I’ve been gone so long
And all I want is to move on
At night I lay awake and wonder how else to make amends
But can’t help but start to think they’re never gonna let me start again
Cause lord I’ve been gone so long
Now this place don’t feel like home
I’ve been gone so long
And all I want is to move on
Reckless Son
I’ve been trying to talk with my old man
Says he knows me better then I’ll ever understand
But still he can’t explain the things I’ve done
Or what it’s like to be the father of a Reckless Son
And for all the years I made sure I was numb
All the liquored up conversations where I played deaf and dumb
For all the screaming angels in my heart and in my head
Not a word was spoken until my father said
I can’t hide you from your own hands
Or lift you from your knees
But I’m preparing myself to have to dig your grave
We’ll both be humbled by the will of God
And the wrath of your disease
But how could any man have to be so brave
To know that nothing can be done
For the father of a Reckless Son
Alone inside a family where we pass around the blame
You can keep your interventions, all you gave me was my name
Waiting for the moment where I can meet you with my fists
But punishing myself was the only thorn that I could twist
Cause you can’t hide me from my own hands
Or lift me from my knees
But you’re preparing yourself to have to walk away
We’ll both be humbled by the will of God,
And the power of our needs
And all that’s left for you to do is pray
For all the battles that you’ve won
You’re the father of a reckless son
And I know you’ve had to see me walk into the rain
And you knew you couldn’t pull me back
But your love was never shown to me in vain
You put your arms around me and the walls begin to crack
But I know I’m the only one
Who can do what must be done
So with every breath in my lungs
Hear the promise of a Reckless Son
St. Christopher's Inn
There’s ash in my mouth and dust on my skin
Mud on my knees and blood on my shins
And another dead end means it’s time to begin
The road back home to St. Christopher’s Inn
Now folks look at me like I’m destined to lose,
With my track marks and Jesus Christ tattoos
But I’m too tired to tell them to walk in my shoes
So I’m going where a man is never refused
Oh but I fear I’ll never feel free
And sick and tired is all I’ll ever be
And it grips me so tightly I barely can breathe
Oh merciful lord please take this from me
And now every time that I rise from the dead
St. Anthony’s cross hangs over my bed
And the prayer of St. Francis is stuck in my head,
I’ve been there before and I’m going again
Oh but I fear I’ll never feel free
And sick and tired is all I’ll ever be
And it grips me so tightly I barely can breathe
Oh merciful lord please take this from me
But the hope that sustains me comes deep from within
And God loves the sinners cause God’s in the sin
And I am who I am cause of where I have been
On the road back home to St. Christopher’s Inn
Yes I’m going back home to St. Christopher’s Inn
The Wisdom Of A Child
On deck aboard a pilot boat
We waited for the light
Huddled close we warmed our hands breathing fog into the night
Through ancient ways of navigation, following a star
Oh brother I can't tell you where you’re going but I know just where you are
Cause every time I close my eyes
And sink into a sleep
Or stare across the sky
I hear the sound of your heart beat
I see the man that you've become
Following a dream
Dream dream
Skate across the ocean like a figure on the ice
But waves will come a crashing down like tumbling dice
Place no faith in destinations, be they near or far
Oh brother I can't tell you where you're going but I know just who you are
Cause I've watched you as you've grown up tall
Humble in your rising
And gracious in a fall
You'll see the world, you'll see it all
As the man that you've become
In service of a call
Just listen for your call
And when the night begins to fall for days
Soon you'll ask what makes this world this way
Inside the silence if you start to pray
You will hear,
A voice will say
That patiently the water's waiting there for you and me
A thousand miles of ocean only leads into the sea
But your hands will trace the state of Grace, a map from up above
Cause brother I can tell that where you're going
You're bringing light and bringing love
So I'll follow as you light my way
With the wisdom of a child joyously at play
I'll find you as you find your own way
As the man that you've become
The man you are today
Just One
I think I ask too many questions
And I know I’ll never understand
How to help all those around me
When I am just one man
And there’s so many who feel helpless
That there’s just too much to be done
But I know that it makes all the difference
That revolution has begun
If I can help just one
And he can help just one
And she can help just one
If we can help just one
I’ll put my heart into my labor
And I’ll burn my back under the sun
I’ll share the harvest with my all my neighbors
I’ll work until my hands are numb
If I can help just one
And he can help just one
And she can help just one
If we can help just one
I always gave to the collection
Always hoping I’d get something back
So now I’ll offer this reflection
To all the mourners dressed in black
Lord knows it’s so hard to pray
When mercy only comes to some
But we seek forgiveness when we rise each day
Because our work is never done
If we can help just one
If we can help just one
If we can help just one
If we can help just one
Just One
Thicker Skin
Hello young man, won’t you come in and sit for a little while
I don’t know how long it’s been since I’ve seen you smile
And I remember days you laughed more than you cried
Can you tell me what it was that hurt you? Who it was that lied?
And tell me why you spend all your time alone
And why you turn away from all the love that you’ve been shown
I don’t know where you think you’re going to go
You lost your confidence, and it seems you lost it long ago
Boy you need a thicker skin
Sometimes even the best of us have to take it on the chin
Boy you need a thicker skin
And maybe you’re the one you need to learn how to forgive
Cause you’ve always had it in your head you had to be the best
And now you’ve failed so many times all you feel is uselessness
You blame the world for shattering your dreams
But it’s clearly your own guilt that has you bursting at the seams
And no one has the time to hear all your regrets
Or stories about tragedies that haven’t happened yet
And it’s only in your mind you still can’t seem to win
But you’re life will pass you by while you’re waiting for it to begin
Boy you need a thicker skin
Sometimes even the best of us have to take it on the chin
Boy you need a thicker skin
And I hope you start to see you’ve still got so much to give
Cause I promise you that someday soon you’ll hear a knocking at your door
And faced with someone just like you you’ll know what all of this was for
And for every morning you wake up afraid to face the day
The gift that you receive will be someone else to show the way
Boy you need a thicker skin
Sometimes even the best of us have to take it on the chin
Boy you need a thicker skin
You gotta give yourself a chance to truly love
And truly live
Counting The Days
Sound of the flies buzzing like a drill
Blood pooling on the table with the beer he spilled
I was frozen still
Too hot outside to dig a hole in the sand
And too tired to hide the gun in my hand
There was never a plan
But when I saw him sitting there watching TV
I knew he wasn’t planning on letting me be
One of us was always gonna end up dead
But he never saw it coming when he got up and said
Alright, did you come around here looking for a fight?
Okay, cause boy you look like you got something to say
Well I just might, are you ready old man to say goodnight?
God be praised, now I’m locked in here
I’m just counting the days
It was always gonna be this way
All summer long he was always around
Had a job painting houses in another town
But couldn’t hold it down
So I’d go out at night and I’d come home late
He’d have the lights turned off but he was wide awake
He was happy to wait
But I didn’t mind the hits I took
If it got my little sister off the hook
I can still hear the sound of her screams
And I can hear him shouting every night in my dreams
Alright, did you come around here looking for a fight?
Okay, cause boy you look like you got something to say
Well I just might, are you ready old man to say goodnight?
God be praised, now I’m locked in here
I’m just counting the days
It was always gonna be this way
I’ll tell you right now I always knew I was gonna end up in these prison blues
And if I had a choice, I’d do it again
When I hear that voice I say Amen
Alright, did you come around here looking for a fight?
Okay, cause boy you look like you got something to say
Well I just might, are you ready old man to say goodnight?
God be praised, now I’m locked in here
I’m just counting the days
It was always gonna be this way
Like A River
At night I pray to rise before the sun is up
For a moment to myself and the fading memory of my dreams
I wipe my eyes and I fill my cup
And try to pray for someone else, cause I have everything I need
Then daylight spills across the room and the work of yesterday resumes
Mistakes are made in every plan to face all that the day demands
I can only hope to grow and learn to let it go
And live like a river flows
And let love be like water flooding everywhere I go
And give with all my heart and soul
Surrendering to everything I know I can’t control
And know my life is not my own
I step into the air and I hold my breath
One foot before the next, and make my way on down the streets
And ask myself why I just can’t connect
Because I see myself in every stranger that I meet
The drifters and the orphan boys
The businessman collecting toys
The outlaws with their smoking guns
The princes and the favorite sons
It’s who I am, it’s what I’ve done
So for each and every one
I’ll live like a river flows
And let love be like water flooding everywhere I go
And give with all my heart and soul
Surrendering to everything I know I can’t control
And know my life is not my own
Oh it’s a promise I’ve made
But will I do anything to keep my word?
Or will I just be too afraid to free the voice inside me that’s dying to be heard
Singing live like a river flows
And let love be like water flooding everywhere I go
And give with all my heart and soul
Surrendering to everything I know I can’t control
And know my life is not my own
Justice or Mercy
Surviving in the silence and dying to be heard
I know if I come clean I’ll get what I deserve
But I want you to know
I want you to know my heart
Justice or mercy, what will it be?
Lord don’t give me justice
Just have mercy on me
Mercy on me
Days are getting shorter and my time is running out
Light is disappearing in the shadow of my doubts
How far can I run?
‘Til I’m back at the start?
Justice or mercy will set me free
Lord don’t give me justice
Just have mercy on me
Mercy on me
There’s no other answer
I tried every other way
No matter what I do there’s a price I’ve gotta pay
So I’m coming to you before I fall apart
Justice or mercy, do as you please
I don’t need forgiveness
I just need some relief
Mercy on me
Fear & Desire
Sophie lies naked on the edge of the bed
The clip in the ashtray is smoldering red
She stares out the window but turns when she says
Fear and Desire’s all I’ve got in my head
Fear and Desire make me wish I was dead
She lights a green candle and runs her fingers through the flame
And says now that you’ve had me things will never be the same
Take what you want but it won’t take away the pain
Cause Fear and Desire’s all we’ve got besides shame
Fear and Desire’s all we’ve got left to blame
And there’s nothing left you can say
Don’t you try to tell me boy that everything is ok
Cause you know I know the truth
And now Fear and Desire’s all we’ve got left to lose
You see my Jack is old fashioned and he hates it when I’m sad
Says I’m nothing but a child when he takes me like a man
But the baby inside me wasn’t part of his plan
Cause he’ll never leave his woman, never ask for my hand
Fear and Desire’s all my Jack understands
And there’s nothing you can do
Don’t lie and say you love me, you’ll take care of us two
You knew you were my only friend
Now Fear and Desire’s brought that all to an end
She rose from her bedside
And she started to pray
She warned me I should leave
But didn’t mind if I stayed
Always kept her windows open
Said it let in the day
I was too scared to move as I watched her fall away
Fear and Desire always leaves us betrayed
Ride Again
I was praying, almost every night
To a little St. Francis that I won in a fight
Still running,
On and off of the streets,
But keeping it clean since I got back east
And that’s where we met, on the lower east side,
And you told me all about the horses you used to ride
I already knew you had taken a fall,
In the dust of the summer, when the nighttime calls
You landed here with us all
With your shattered heart you’re coming of age,
You’re not falling down, no you’re turning the page
You’re gonna ride again
Ride again
Ride again
Racing,
With the wind in your hair,
A feeling just like that, nothing could ever compare
We’re chasing things we think that we need,
When we never even bothered with all the things we could be
Kissing the scars across my chest,
Kissing the tears running down your neck
Don’t cover it up or wipe it away
We take a little pride in taking the pain
Cause there’s so much that remains
With your shattered heart you’re coming of age,
You’re not falling down, no you’re turning the page
With your trembling hands you’re taking the reins
With the strength to stand and surrender the shame
You’re gonna ride again
Ride again
Ride again